Stuck in Airport Hell

I'd just like to take this opportunity to say YAY for the Proactive vending machine in JFK. After a 16 and 1/2 hour flight, my face was in desperate need of a good scrub this fine morning, and alas, I had no soap. So thank you, kind vending gods.

I was also surprised to find that I had acquired THE SWEETEST hairdo of my life after the longest flight of death EVER. Although the plane we were on was possibly the coolest thing ever imagined (dude! beds that lay totally flat within their own little private cubicles), sleeping like a rock for 9 hours straight did nothing for me. So here's another shout out to the man who invented the idea of the tourist shop in the airport...and also to the creator of the classic NY Yankees ball cap. Without your help, I would be wandering these halls looking like a female sasquatch.

Ahh...vanity. Or whatever.

But ov coooourse...I digress. The real reason for my post today was to allow me to present 3 MORE THINGS ABOUT INDIA for your reading pleasure. Actually, let's be honest: this is more for my writing pleasure. And a way to pass the next 5 hours of ungodly layover time I am staring in the face. *la la la*

Thing #1: Aren't these little ladies the sweetest angels you've ever seen? As we were walking out of the Jain temple, the tour guide started telling us about these good luck "charm" things laying on the board* at their feet. My original intention was to take a picture of those, but then I was bewitched by those big eyes. The "charm" things though - this is a huge thing over there. It starts with that...mmm...little green round vegetable thing, a carrot, and 7 green beans...then ends with a piece of chocolate (please note my exquisite short term memory skills here - I can't know what the hell kind of veggies they are, but whatever. Work with me, people.); the gist is that you hang this at your place of business to ward off bad luck for the next 7 days. So you see these EVERYWHERE - hanging off of taxi bumpers and rickshaw meters. I personally don't go in for such superstitions myself, but I thought it was intriguing that such a large population there does. Please note the cash in that lady's hand - you have to pay people to take their picture there. Best 10 rupees I ever spent.





Thing 2: So then we headed to a park called the Hanging Gardens...where I found this lovely "hind-english" sign, which cracked me up:


...and also some lovely "Edward Scissorhands" type creations:

This park is right next to the Parsi burial ground (actually, burial towersthat you can't see). How's this for fascinating - when a Parsi dies, he is taken to these towers, and after being wrapped in white and prayed over, he is marched to the top of the tower, laid on an iron grate, and left for the vultures. As they consume the body, the bones fall through the iron grate and are later burned. So everything is returned to the earth without actually returning it to the earth - as we do western style. I am not kidding when I tell you that there were vultures circling just over the hill from where we stood.

I have mixed feelings about that. While I respect it, it's not the way I want to go. AT ALL.

Thing 3: And then - my FAVORITE! A real, local market. This is the kind of place that tourists NEVER go to:

Honestly? I think our guide just wanted to buy some broccoli and some strawberry tea**, but truthfully? I loved seeing this. It feels more real than the ritzy tourist traps...more "true to life" for the typical Mumbai-an. Mumbai-ist? Mumbai-ite? For instance - the guy in the shot below. This shop is his livelihood - his life, actually. Notice the hatch in the roof above his head? That's how he gets TO HIS BED, because not only does he work here, but he lives here too. On top of his store. It's like living on the top shelf of a warehouse, and the amount of living space you are allocated is like 5 feet by maybe 7 feet.

I hope he becomes a millionaire someday.

So hmm. Only another 4 and 1/2 hours to go until my flight home. And then? Then I plan to DEVOUR A WHOLE COW. The Indian diet is so high in carbs!

Here's a freebie, since I have time to waste - the Arabian Sea:

* Please forgive...but I cannot remember the name of anything Indian. They speak so fast that I hardly have my head wrapped around the first vowel before they are talking about the next subject.
** And oh! It's the only place I ever saw a Mt. Dew the whole time I was there. I didn't dare to drink it though.